Tuesday, June 22, 2010


Here's a video I found on Red Ice Creations. It's about human resonance and is really interesting!

I've been thinking alot about resonance lately. For whatever reason the word just keeps popping up in my conversations with people. I've been paying closer attention to the many coincidences in my life. These coincidences usually involve subjects or events that resonate with me on a personal level.

Resonance has many definitions but for the purposes of this blog I will define resonance as something that speaks to you in a deep meaningful way. You may not understand why you like a certain thing; you just do. Things resonate with us on a subatomic, subconscious level. To me resonance is that mysterious force that connects us with the unseen world around us, the world we feel but cannot see.

Pay attention to the things that resonate with you! The more you pay attention the more benefits you will receive from this mysterious force.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Demeter+Persephone: A Merging of the Goddesses

I'm transitioning right now. I can't explain it any other way. Whole sections of my life are altering themselves and there is something poetic and inevitable about it. It's almost completely out of my control and for the most part I just kind of sit back, detached, an unconcerned spectator to the spectacle. Ever so often some thing happens that jars me and forces me to pay closer attention. So now I am.

Years ago I developed a strong interest in goddesses. There is something about the goddess that strongly resonates with me. Years ago I was reading some book about goddesses and in it I found some throw-away footnote on Persephone and Demeter. I was intrigued by their story. I immediately did more research and found that Persephone's story really spoke to me in a way that I can't express adequately with words. Persephone, the innocent, Persephone the beautiful, abducted and held against her will in the dark Underworld. And Demeter, the giver of the grain, grieving for her daughter so deeply that she would deny life. I didn't know why this story had such a profound effect on me. Now, years later, I do.

A Summary

Persephone is the goddess of the underworld in Greek mythology. She is the daughter of Zeus and Demeter, goddess of the harvest. Persephone was such a beautiful young woman that everyone loved her, even Hades wanted her for himself. One day, when she was collecting flowers on the plain of Enna, the earth suddenly opened and Hades rose up from the gap and abducted her. None but Zeus, and the all-seeing sun, Helios, had noticed it.

Broken-hearted, Demeter wandered the earth, looking for her daughter until Helios revealed what had happened. Demeter was so angry that she withdrew herself in loneliness, and the earth ceased to be fertile. Knowing this could not continue much longer, Zeus sent Hermes down to Hades to make him release Persephone. Hades grudgingly agreed, but before she went back he gave Persephone a pomegranate (or the seeds of a pomegranate, according to some sources). When she later ate of it, it bound her to underworld forever and she had to stay there one-third of the year. The other months she stayed with her mother. When Persephone was in Hades, Demeter refused to let anything grow and winter began. This myth is a symbol of the budding and dying of nature. In the Eleusinian mysteries, this happening was celebrated in honor of Demeter and Persephone, who was known in this cult as Kore.

"Persephone." Encyclopedia Mythica from Encyclopedia Mythica Online.

You Are the Greek Goddess Demeter
You are an Earth Mother, provider of delicious food and beautiful children. You prefer the company of the young, but you have a decided wanderlust, which makes being tied down lead to periods of depression. You are conscientious, law-abiding, and spiritual.

This above description is cheesy as hell but I added it for a reason. I was talking to someone recently and I attempted to describe myself in a way that illustrated the difference in the way that the world sees me and how I see myself. I said "People see me as an Earth Mother type....I love to cook and bake.....I love kids and want to teach them..." so when I saw this I was struck by the similarities between the perception of me and the description of Demeter. Demeter is nurturing. She brings life to the world. She is maternal. She is fiercely loyal. She feeds you and fucks you and does whatever it takes to make you happy. If you had asked me just six months ago to describe myself I would have used many of these same words. Without my knowing it Demeter and I were connected. I was living her energy. I was expressing the Demeter archetype without even realizing that I was. I poured every bit of my available energy into other people, other things, wearing the perfect mask. Somehow my psyche got tired of it. Expressing Demeter has caused me forgo myself and my own needs, my sense of self, my sexuality, my swag. I love the Demeter parts of me but my life had been so consumed with her that I wasn't even important enough to warrant an afterthought.
In my opinion, anytime a schism occurs between dual parts of ourselves the neglected part is going to make itself known, in small ways at first, and the longer you ignore it the worse the acting out will be. I'm quiet and introspective. I pay attention to myself. But it still took time to notice the other part of me, calling out. I needed to pay attention to Persephone as well.


Persephone may be young and innocent and beautiful but really, when you boil her story down to its essence, Persephone embodies desire. She is so desirable that Hades, god of the Underworld, cannot live without her. He wants her so much that he will risk the wrath of the gods and the death of the world, to control her. Hades, who has certainly been around the block a time or two, is said to be drawn to her innocence and beauty. What must it say about Persephone that Hades, who has certainly seen it all and done the rest, would go to such lengths to have her?

I wanted to express my own inner Persephone. I wanted to be sexy and beautiful. I wanted to be spoiled and cherished. I wanted to be a part of that insane lust, that mad desire, that intense pursuit, that domination. I wanted to find all of that craziness for myself, in myself. It was time to let Hades come take me.

Isolation and Possession
In order to really experience and manifest Persephone energy you have to throw yourself into it. Nothing can get in the way. You have to become isolated and fully possessed. In some way you have to become almost childlike in your devotion to yourself. Self becomes everything. I made sure to pay as much, or more, attention to not just the things that I needed but to the things I wanted. I didn't give a shit if you liked it. I explored everything with to excess and with complete abandon: food, wine, books, orgasms.

When I think about that time now I realize that it could not and should not last. No That kind of selfishness was as destructive to me as my previous self-neglect. My dual parts, Persephone and Demeter, needed to merge. It took time and a real conscientious effort but now I can express both goddesses equally. They have merged in a way that makes my life fuller. I can focus on me, as well as all the other responsibilities that comprise my life. I'm happier for it and more fulfilled.

This is my Persephone/Demeter story and I this is how it played out for me. Others may have another archetype from which they need to work. Just make sure that whatever is going on with yourself that you pay attention. There is nothing really hidden from us if we take enough time to look.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

The Office

I'm scared to post this. It's unedited but I enjoy this story so I hope you will too. It's for adults so if you're not one don't read it. I told someone I was in a mood and this is the result. Hope you like it.

The Office

I’m sitting in a black swivel chair staring at a blank computer screen. My fingers run idly over the keyboard, absently tick-tick-ticking away. There is a lull in the activity at our little office. The action has slowed, stilled and finally stopped. It’s late in the day and the two of us are alone now. It’s not quite closing time but its close enough that I can start looking forward to being home with a glass of wine, which I desperately need. I feel wound up inside, tight, feeling a vague sense of danger, the kind that comes out of nowhere, the kind that you may or may not expect. I feel as if I have been standing at attention all day waiting on my commanding officer to yell “At Ease!”

This room is so cold. I blow on my hands, hoping to warm them up. My nipples respond to the frigid air, firming up into tight buds that are vaguely uncomfortable. I focus on the tendrils of pleasure /pain that come from my nipples. It’s only mildly distracting. Nothing is strong enough to make me forget that he is there, just a few steps away.

Damn it’s really cold in here! My fingers, my feet, my bare arms, are cool. My bare legs, protected from the coolness by my desk, are comfortable. I place my hands close to my inner thigh hoping to warm them. I rub my fingers over the lushness of my thighs. My thighs are so, so soft. The sensation of opposites, the cold fingers over the warm thighs, is arousing. My hands sink further into the softness of my thighs. They are supple, so pliable like bread dough. I move my hands closer to the heat between my legs, up up up by slow degrees. I’m not so cold anymore but I still feel the tension, tight and high strung. I know that I want to have an orgasm. I need to have an orgasm.

I could move my hands up further up my skirt. Touch myself just enough and make myself cum. He would never know. My body is hidden behind my desk. He can’t see me. I just want to feel normal again, to remove this tension. If I touch myself just there, just right, I could make myself orgasm. A few more inches upward and I am closer. It’s warmer up here. Wetter too. I take three deep breaths. I rub myself through my panties. Sparks burst forth. Already I feel myself slipping, floating. My heartbeat accelerates. Am I brave enough to do this? He may not be able to see me. But what if he can smell me? The smell of sex is distinctive, and it lingers. He will smell my cum. I make a decision to just lightly touch my clit, just tease myself enough that when I get home, fuck it, when I get in my car, any place private, I can get off.

My fist is completely up my skirt, brushing the moist center of my panties, when my boss walks out. I freeze and plaster a bright, professional smile on my face. I am afraid that he knows, that he has watched me from his office door and he knows what I’m here trying to do. “I’m on my way to the bank. I’ll be back in a while”. He breezes out the door. He is, as usual, oblivious to me, to anything concerning me. I am nothing but the help as far as he is concerned. I want him to notice me, I want to fuck him. This thought almost dims my arousal, almost.

It’s after 3 pm. No one comes in this late. And it’s raining. I unbutton the first three buttons of my shirts, exposing my lacy black bra and the tops of my breasts. I have warmed up considerably. I decide to continue. Things are private now. He has gone and taken the rest of my inhibitions with him. If I were honest with myself I would admit that he is the source of this frustration. He is my tension and my arousal. Maybe when I finally slide my fingers inside myself I’ll close my eyes and imagine his face. But for now he is gone and he has taken my inhibitions with him.
I pull my bra down, exposing one chocolate nipple to the kiss of the cool air. There, I think, that feels good. All of a sudden I am impatient, combustible, explosive. I move my hand back up my skirt. He could be back soon. I touch the front of my wet panties. I hook two fingers around the back of my panties and pull them to the side, exposing my clit and my cum to the air. My fingers slide between my lips. They glide through the wetness, slippery and slick. I use my thumb to rub my clit round and round. I slide three fingers inside me. Oh God! This is just what I needed. It feels so good. I close my eyes, the better to savor the sensation. I know just how much pressure I need, how deep I need to go, how fast I need to rub. I move my hips to the rhythm I set.

My chest tightens up. My heart beats faster. My breathing changes, catches in my throat. I feel my pussy pull, as elemental as gravity. The wetness slurps loudly. My pussy is talking to me and I can hear it. My mouth opens, preparing the sounds. My God, I feel it! I feel you. My walls suck my streaming fingers in, wrap around them, imprisoning me inside. The waves break and it is beyond bliss. When I come it is powerful. My orgasm has rendered me speechless. I am unable to make any sound.
It takes me a few moments to drift back. I am boneless, nearly liquid, completely satiated. My tension, my frustration has been obliterated by an ancient power, a stronger energy. Slowly I remember my surroundings. I fix my bra and button my shirt. I adjust my skirt. My face is composed, serene, politely distant. My orgasm has restored me.

When he walks through the door minutes later I flash my bright, professional receptionist’s smile. Everything looks exactly the same as when he left. “I got back quicker than I expected” he says, as he breezes back through the door. Halfway into his office he stops and turns back toward me. He cocks his head to the side. I see him subtly sniff the air. I watch his face change, reassessing the situation, feeling the energy. He walks back into his office. A few seconds later he peeks his head around the corner. “You look different today”, he says. I smile as he disappears around the back into his office. For once he is not oblivious.

The end

Saturday, June 12, 2010


The Peach as a Sexual Experience
I love peaches....no, love is too mild a word... I ADORE peaches. Every summer, when the time is right, I stalk the stalls at the farmer's market waiting on the ripest peaches to be rolled out. Around the month of May the anticipation has become almost palpable and I can't wait until June to get my hands on my favorite juicy fruits.

In sexual terms foreplay can refer to any action that gets the sexual fires started. Touch is definitely one of those. Touching a peach is everything when it comes to picking the right one. I pick up the peach and rub it, gently, to see how plush it is. I take the peach firmly in the palm of my hand and run my fingers around the globe, pressing very, very gently, to see if the peach has any "give" to it. The juiciest peaches are slightly soft, exceptionally ripe. If it feels right in your hands then you just know when you bite into it that you will feel the juice burst out onto your tongue. Another key trait to look for is the color. Darker peaches are usually more ripe and therefore are sweeter and juicier than ones with more of a blush on it. After I've picked my peach, and when all the rubbing, smelling and groping are done, I head home, near to bursting with all that juicy goodness waiting to be savored.

IntercourseHere's a definition for you:
Intercourse \In"ter*course\, n.1. A commingling; intimate connection or dealings between persons or nations, interchange of thought and feeling; association; communion. [1913 Webster]

So I've picked my peach. I'm home alone and waiting on just the right moment to bite into my peach. My anticipation could not be stronger. I'm thinking of all the possibilities. See, every peach is different. Some can be really really juicy but not all that sweet. Others can be really really sweet but not all that juicy. You're always hoping that you find that one peach, that one in a million peach, that is both. Once, when I was still a young teenager my mom, my sister and I were on a trip back home after visiting relatives. There was a roadside fruit stand and my mom, on impulse, pulled over and bought some peaches. They were so lovely! As soon as my mom paid the man for the peaches I grabbed the biggest one and in a fit of impatience that only the young can fully appreciate I bit into the peach. God it was heavenly! I used my mouth and my tongue to bite down into the flesh and then suck, suck all the nectar into my mouth. It was divine! There was just the right amount of sweetness on my tongue. The peach was so full that the juices ran down my arm. I'm telling you, that peach was beyond delicious....and I'm hoping the one I'm about to eat is nearly as good.

I grab my chosen peach, forcefully, gently, longingly, and I put it up to my lips. I take a moment to smell the sweet, tart, tangy smell of the peach. My heart beats a little faster, my senses sharpen, my mouth waters. I relish the feel of its fuzz against my lips....Then, because I cannot bear to wait another minute, I bite into the flesh. Juices flood over, into my mouth, down my arm and past that part of my brain that distinguishes the act of intercourse with someone from the act of intercourse with something, namely this peach. I am reminded of how hard it has been these past few months to be without my beloved summer peaches. I am reminded of why I love being a southern girl who is in love with southern peaches. I am reminded that I am in love again...with a peach....

To everything there is a season and your season, dear peach, has come back around. Thank goodness for that! Gracious, baby, how I've missed you!