One of my jobs is at a bookstore. It's a chain store and it lacks the intimacy and quaint coolness that a mom and pop bookstore would have but I love it still. I love it because I love books and when I work there I get the feeling that I can contribute some small thing to the customers at the store; I can share ideas, and books, with them. In some small way I'm sharing a small part of myself with them and them with me. This is a magical thing most of the time; other times, not so much.
I haven't worked with the public in years and this part time job of mine put me back in the midst of the people out there on a much closer scale than I have experienced in the recent past. I was struck by one big thought...people really do seem stranger than I remember. There are some things that people do that leave me baffled, unnerved and sometimes just a little afraid. For instance we have a duo that comes in ever so often and can spend anywhere from $300 to $700 on just stuff in the bookstore. They order their cheap tea specially made using 2 separate spigots so that its "hot enough to burn [their] tongues". Their make-up is plentiful and garish. They speak with a faux British accent that is clearly an affectation. They wear fur coats, even on temperate days and they leave piles and piles and piles of books on the table for us to clean up. I am greatly amused by them and I love making up stories about their lives in my head. I could probably spend a whole afternoon discovering what goes on in their minds.
Then there is a male customer that comes in every month or so and purchases books on BDSM, porn and strangely, to me at least, gardening. He always buys these books together, all the time, everytime. If you read my blog, you know I'm not afraid of sexuality and I dont automatically consider a person a weirdo just because they engage in behavior that I may not exactly be in to. But there is something sinister about this customer; his energy is jumpy, dense, heavy, gray. He is clearly not ashamed of his proclivities and to me its neither here nor there what his ass likes. I just can't get past his aura.
There are many many more stories like this that I could share with you and many more that are downright disgusting (what some people do in the bathrooms would make you gag) but suffice it to say that working with the public gives you a glimpse into the mind of the macrocosm. The world is as dysfunctional as I've ever seen it and believe me I have been paying attention for a long while.
I wonder why this is. I wonder what is happening to the universe on a macro level that affects us here on the micro level so profoundly. As above, so below. What the hell is going on out there that we down here are becoming so extra- crazy or stupid or mean or [supply your own adjective here]?
Earth, Air Fire and Water: The four classical elements. In our own way we require some form of each of these elements to survive this human life. As a Scorpio I am primarily water but what would I do without my Fire, my Air, and my Earth? And also what would I do without my Ether, that mystical fifth element that contains all things and the space necessary to contain it? The Ether is carrying around all this massive swirl of stuff, this experience of all Experiences and its power is causing you and me and them and us and the whole world to be real, Really Real, really us. You feel me? So I think that all this strangeness is just the ether serving its purpose which is to reduce everything down to its essence. Most of the time we don't notice so the ether gives us more pronounced forms of dysfunction to jar us into paying attention. Thousands of birds falling dead from the sky, check! Deadly floods roaring to life, check! Schizophrenic shooters killing kids, check! All this is meant to grab us and make us pay attention. Yes atrocities have always happened but now, in this day and age, there seems to be a purpose to the madness. At least it seems that way to me.
Having said all that I still ain't that nervous about it. What will be, will be and as long as we go with the flow all will be easier, I think. But who really knows?
If you want to read a really good post by a fellow blogger of mine about her love of books go here.
It's a less rambling, more cohesive version of what this post was originally supposed to be about. I love how she featured the one place that I love unconditionally; the library!
I'm still in the process of figuring out what I want this blog to be but instead of waiting on the inspiration to hit me I will just post what I feel, when I feel it.
As always please post comments, if you have something you want to say. I love reading what you guys have to say.
Peace
1 comments:
Heya Neky,
As the world gets more and more freaky-deaky there's also massive positive changes happening simultaneously, in my humble opinion.
The dark and the light always coexist. They have to, because they're opposite ends of the same spectrum. If anyone in the 'alternative community' is in any doubt that the world is changing in powerful and disturbing ways, then they're just not looking hard enough, you feel me?
I say don't be afraid of looking at the darkest AND the brightest aspects of your own character, or the character of humanity in general - go with the flow and hold on to the things and people that you love.
But then, someone as intelligent as you knows this already.
Strange Days Indeed.
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